Okaaaaaay. So I was going to type out my idea for re-ordering the beginning but then I had this "brilliant" flash of inspiration for how to get a Wes POV in earlier. Maybe. Except I'm not sure I like the reader's first view of Wes being from his own POV.
Anyway, here was my thought process and we can think about whether there is anything useful to take from it. My idea was to split up my original chapter 2 (the Devin one) so the first half is from Wes's POV.
Start with Wes and Devin at the grocery store. Wes is... sort of excited because Devin is coming with him to the grocery store and he never does that. Devin is half-awake and Wes is pestering him about the Reaping Festival. Devin is being Devin. Maybe Devin points out how much stuff they have in the grocery stores here versus back home (he doesn't go to the store much -- it would be worth pointing out). Wes doesn't actually know what the stores were like back home. He never had to go shopping because they had a lady who did that or all their stuff was delivered to their door or whatever.
I just realized, though. The whole reason Wes keeps pestering Devin about the Reaping Festival. Devin is worried about something and he's not talking about it. Kalen must have let him know he wanted to build a bomb when he said he was coming over. Or asked questions about building them. He knows that whatever Kalen wants to do when he comes over, it's bad news. He has not explained this to Wes.
Wes hasn't really forgotten Kalen is coming over. He's bugging Devin about the Reaping Festival either to try to distract him or to try to get him to talk about what's bothering him. Or both. He's been acting weird since he told Wes that Kalen was coming over. Or something.
The only real issue I have with this is that Wes's voice is a combination of puppy and teenage girl and I'm not sure if that or seeing him from Devin's perspective first is a better introduction.
But anyway. That was my brilliant insight. Now to figure out if I'm supposed to do anything with it.
Re: scene 2-kalen & calla thoughts
Anyway, here was my thought process and we can think about whether there is anything useful to take from it. My idea was to split up my original chapter 2 (the Devin one) so the first half is from Wes's POV.
Start with Wes and Devin at the grocery store. Wes is... sort of excited because Devin is coming with him to the grocery store and he never does that. Devin is half-awake and Wes is pestering him about the Reaping Festival. Devin is being Devin. Maybe Devin points out how much stuff they have in the grocery stores here versus back home (he doesn't go to the store much -- it would be worth pointing out). Wes doesn't actually know what the stores were like back home. He never had to go shopping because they had a lady who did that or all their stuff was delivered to their door or whatever.
I just realized, though. The whole reason Wes keeps pestering Devin about the Reaping Festival. Devin is worried about something and he's not talking about it. Kalen must have let him know he wanted to build a bomb when he said he was coming over. Or asked questions about building them. He knows that whatever Kalen wants to do when he comes over, it's bad news. He has not explained this to Wes.
Wes hasn't really forgotten Kalen is coming over. He's bugging Devin about the Reaping Festival either to try to distract him or to try to get him to talk about what's bothering him. Or both. He's been acting weird since he told Wes that Kalen was coming over. Or something.
The only real issue I have with this is that Wes's voice is a combination of puppy and teenage girl and I'm not sure if that or seeing him from Devin's perspective first is a better introduction.
But anyway. That was my brilliant insight. Now to figure out if I'm supposed to do anything with it.